Sunday, March 11, 2012

Mama said there'd be days likes this.... Or weeks...

Why do problems have to travel in multiples? Why can't they just happen one at a time with time to recover in between? These are the thoughts that have been going through my mind the last couple of days. Well that and why the heck me Lord!!! Why now? Do I really need to learn another lesson? (which then makes me chuckle a little because I am super hard headed so a lot of lessons have to be re taught)

It first started out with a pipe under our house busting. Once we figured out how to turn the water off at 1100 at night and Wes crawled under our house we thought "no big deal... it's an annoying problem but not an overwhelming problem"! I think our thought process was this is going to be inexpensive unlike most of the other things that seem to pop up unexpected.

So no biggy... We'd get to it. Wes and I both had the weekend off work... it would get done. We still wanted to enjoy our weekend together as a family. It wasn't a big deal right? Wrong! After 3 trips to Home Depot and 4 times under the house... One time to include the entire family because Wes needed my help under there to hold the flashlight (why do I ALWAYS get that job... I mean for real). Well we couldn't leave Ian alone in the house... no telling what he would do... Probably go outside and try to find us and well he's 4 years old you know where my mom's mind is going. So here we go all under the house... Wes first then Ian and then me. Yes this included Army crawl from us all and a painful attempt at opening the plumbers glue (kinda funny story) we now have water! Yay!

Well everywhere but our main toilet! Because after this was all said and done Wes was cleaning the bathroom floors (yes he helps me clean and I love him for it) and all of a sudden I hear water spraying. The tube, wire or cord... whatever the heck connects the toilet to the floor thingy (I'm so intelligent about plumbing can you tell lol) had come unattached and after turning the water to the toilet off we (well Wes) realized he's going to have to go get another tube, wire, cord... whatever it is! So the main toilet is on the fritz and I am having a party Tuesday night. Quite a few ladies... no toilet... yeah not a good combo! But Wesley assures me that he will get it fixed tomorrow! Did I mention I love him!

Well in between pipe under the house busting and toilet hose busting my car tire also decided to bust! Driving down the interstate yesterday and I noticed my left back tire felt really wobbly so after debating back and forth in my head I decided to pull over. I was hesitant because Wes and Ian were both asleep and I would hate to wake them up for a false alarm. Well thank the good Lord I pulled over. When we got out to take a look the tire was smoking and you could see where the rubber was starting to peel off my tire! God was watching over us! After Wes pulled off the tire I realized that the tire had been done in for a while... It had NO tread. So I started checking the other tires and they are pretty much all the same... barely any tread. So I started calling around and found out a few things. One the tires on my car are crap tires! Yay me!!! I also found out that the tires on my car are more expensive then Wesley's truck tires. About $120 a piece!

This hit like a hammer... or really more like a punch in the gut! My mind is racing! How am I supposed to dish out $600 on tires? My focus has been trying to get $2,000 for our next "move" in our adoption process... Not on getting new tires. Well that is not fully true... We knew we needed new tires for my car just like we know we need new tires for Wesley's truck. But we just assumed we would get them gradually... Like one or two at a time so we wouldn't break the bank. So now here I am.. Sunday night ... Both Wes and I needing to go to work tomorrow and my car has a doughnut on it! I still need tires... All 4... It can't be helped... Now I'm also stressing about Wesley's truck needing new tires (another $500). It seems like we will NEVER be able to scrounge up $2,000 so we can get to our next level of adoption!

Put that in the mix of a busting pipe and the toilet plus already in the back of my mind all the money needed for adoption and you now understand why I want to scream "Why me Lord" at the top of my lungs! But when the day comes to an end I know it will eventually work itself out. How? I have no idea but it would be nice to know so I can be prepared. When? Well that would be better... If I had a set date in view I could just count the days down and bide my time.

It wouldn't be so hard if every time I see money leave our hand I realize it's going to take that much longer to have another baby. Then I go back to the thoughts of how I just would love to have a baby on my own. This is not the journey I had planned for me. This is not how I wanted the story of my life to go. But you know what this is how it's going... This is the path that God has decided to put me on. Why? I have no earthly idea... but He must know I'm strong enough for it or else he wouldn't have brought me here. So yeah I'm still stressing about where the money is going to come from... I'm still having a hard time letting go knowing God is going to take care of me.

It's amazing because just in this week I have seen the Lord work a miraculous miracle in the life of a very dear friend of mine. She was needing $1500 and I saw God answer her prayer within 24 hours! Never once did I think God was going to fail her. Never once did I think God wasn't going to pull through for her. I was 100% sure God was going to take care of her because he loves her more then anybody ever could. She is His child! So why is it so hard for me to be as confident when it's my mountain I'm facing? Where is all that faith I had for her? Does God love me any less then her? No! But it's hard and all I can do is pray and trust and sit back and let God show me He can. Because when all is said and done I know I'll look back and think "yep all that stress was for naught... look at how God took care of me there"

No comments:

Post a Comment